This week the Dudes introduced a new segment to the show, the Dick of the Week. The very first recipient of this prestigious award is very deserving. He finds himself staring down a seven-year prison sentence.
That man is none other than “pharma bro” Martin Shkreli. Shkreli was found guilty of securities fraud related to two hedge funds he ran and to his former drug company Retrophin.
Shkreli became public enemy number one by raising the price of the drug Daraprim, which is an HIV drug, by more than 5,000 percent while running the company then known as Turing Pharmaceuticals.
The court has already ordered Shkreli to forfeit almost $7.4 million, and give up his ownership of an exclusive Wu-Tang Clan album that he paid $2 million for because of his crimes. Anyone with the moniker “pharma bro” is doing it wrong.
Shkreli Show Remorse
During the reading of his sentence, Shkreli was reportedly sobbing and crying. According to the Chicago Tribune ‘The defendant hung his head and choked up as he admitted to many mistakes and apologized to the investors he was convicted of defrauding. At one point, a clerk handed him a box of tissues.
“I want the people who came here today to support me to understand one thing: The only person to blame for me being here today is me,” he said. “There is no conspiracy to take down Martin Shkreli. I took down Martin Shkreli.”‘
Federal courtrooms do not allow audio or video recording devices. The audio of the tearful breakdown was not widely spread. However, the Dudes were able to sneak a recording of Shkreli’s reaction, and it does not disappoint. Since his sentencing, Shkreli has asked that he serve his term in a minimum security facility. Regardless of where he serves his term, he’ll become someone’s girlfriend in less than a week.
And because of his crimes, and his blatant middle finger flinging to people by buying lavish things while people became sicker and unable to purchase life-saving medicine, he is the very first Dudes from Dallas “Dick of the Week.”